Tuesday, 23 October 2012

Best jab ever




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Psycho

If you didn't have enough proof that corporations fit every description of  "psychopath", here's the latest:

Energizer Holdingsthe consumer goods conglomerate that produces Banana Boat products, announced Friday that certain of the brand's sunscreen sprays may potentially burst into flames on users' skin if they come in contact with a flame or spark before the spray is completely dry.
Energizer said it has received reports of four "adverse events" in which the sprays have caused burns in the U.S., and one in Canada."Adverse events"??? How else would you categorize someone responsible for causing a human being to suddenly and without warning burst into flames and calling it an "adverse event", if not a psychopath?

"Mr. Browne, this is County Hospital calling. I'm afraid I have some bad news. Your 16 year old daughter was sunbathing and she had a um, 'adverse event'."

"Dang--that girl seems to be allergic to just about everything. How bad is it?"

"Well, let's just say that if she wanted to be cremated, she saved you a little cash."

Full Story.


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Monday, 22 October 2012

Women follow me wherever I go

The following ad has been popping up regularly lately, seemingly following me around.

(Click to enlarge.)

Can someone please explain to me why these busty, attractive women:

a) want me instead of a young man?

b) have so much trouble meeting men that they feel they need to use a dating service? They certainly don't look shy!

c) if they're looking for a sugar daddy, isn't there an app for that?

I think the ad would be more believable if instead of saying "you", it said "Vinny".

Just the same, I'm afraid I have to decline. Sorry, ladies--this old man is taken.


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Sunday, 21 October 2012

Breaking news!

There were no mass killings in the United States, today. Oh, wait--yes, there was.

A shotgun-toting man in suburban Milwaukee, Wisconsin killed three women and injured four others before turning the gun on himself.

There have been at least seven separate incidents of mass murders in the U.S. so far this year, with 110 killed or injured. Has anyone ever stopped to ask why such actions occur with seemingly increasing frequency? I don't mean asking yourself a rhetorical question about it as if there is no known answer to the situation. I mean sitting down and analyzing why a country touted as the land of milk and honey, where opportunities abound, and where the American dream can come true for anyone, has violence on the scale one expects from a third world country steeped in poverty?

Sit down right now and make a list of all the ways in which the U.S. is quite different from most developed countries. The answer will be in front of you. Some of the items may seem counter intuitive to spurring deadly violence on a large scale, but if you think outside the box, you may come to understand the connections.

Then go out and preach the message.

Some of you will think I'm talking nonsense. Others of you won't care, because as long as you're getting yours, so what if (other) people are dying. It's the cost of doing business, right? Wrong. People living in other places in the world are consistently shown to be healthier, happier, more content than Americans, and with a fraction of the threat of violence. It boggles the mind what some people accept as normal and hardly ever give it a thought.


Once again, police respond to a multiple shooting-death scene.

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