It's official

I've gone completely around the bend.

Today, when I got near my kitchen garbage container and smelled that awful smell, the first thing I thought was "How nice--tens of millions of microbes are feasting on my refuse". There may still be some hope for me, though, as my second thought was "I wish their farts didn't smell so bad".


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Tax the stupid

Since there's never been any agreement on who should pay how much tax, I'm going to resolve the issue right here.

Yesterday, I was at the mall and I walked over to a "garbage bin" to discard a coffee cup. There were three separate containers for three types of garbage. I gazed into the "Glass and Plastic Bottles" bin, which was almost half full and was quite surprised to see not a single glass or plastic bottle in it. Instead, there was all kinds of paper, coffee cups, food wrappers, etc. I can understand that a lazy and or stupid person, or perhaps a mentally handicapped person might place an item in the wrong hole, but I have trouble believing that everyone at the mall that day was there to undergo rehabilitation for a severe brain injury.

Anyway, I thought how nice it would be if we had Garbage Police to take names and tax the living crap out of these ignorant slobs. A side benefit would be that it would lower the taxes of the rest of us.

Q & A's from around the web

um, i think i am really hairy down there. can anyone relate or help?

Personally I've started waxing (I do brazilian but you could do bikini) and trimming what is left. i don't use a hair remover cream or gel because it's just smelly

Hmm...that's like eating a skunk sandwich in the middle of a garbage dump and complaining about the smell of garbage.