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Showing posts with label fat. Show all posts
Showing posts with label fat. Show all posts
Wednesday, 13 November 2013
Wednesday, 31 October 2012
New and improved crap
Pizza Hut really struck gold with this idea.
If the lactose in the cheese isn't making you sick enough, the fat and cholesterol in the red meat isn't clogging your arteries enough, and the white flour isn't clogging up your butt enough, throw in some hooves and ears (or beaks and feet if it's a chicken hot dog) into the crust. Oh, there's no time to pick up a phone. You need one right now. Order online! While you're at it, you may as well call the paramedics. The amount of time between suffering a heart attack and receiving treatment is critical for recovery. Invite them in to watch TV with you while you wait for your coronary.
Click here to go to most recent posts.
If the lactose in the cheese isn't making you sick enough, the fat and cholesterol in the red meat isn't clogging your arteries enough, and the white flour isn't clogging up your butt enough, throw in some hooves and ears (or beaks and feet if it's a chicken hot dog) into the crust. Oh, there's no time to pick up a phone. You need one right now. Order online! While you're at it, you may as well call the paramedics. The amount of time between suffering a heart attack and receiving treatment is critical for recovery. Invite them in to watch TV with you while you wait for your coronary.
Click here to go to most recent posts.
Wednesday, 16 June 2010
Q & A's from around the web
I'm a fat dude. Is it possible to get a skinny girl?
"to get" as in capture?
Click here to go to most recent posts.
"to get" as in capture?
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Tuesday, 18 August 2009
Q & A's from around the web
I saw a picture of my ex wife and she's as big as a house? I kind of feel sorry for her but part of me says her new husband deserves her the way she is now. Is it childish for me to think this?
A little. At least you don't wish her to get hit by a fricken train. I'm just sayin'.
It's quite common to feel that way if you parted on bad terms. Send her a letter. Ask her if she's been zoned as a separate address.
I think you're missing the point here. She's as big as a house? Maybe you should try to get back together with her. Install some big windows in the front. Improve the insulation and get central air conditioning. Add a fireplace. Maybe a nice patio. You could fix her up and have free shelter, or maybe even sell her for a profit. Now's the time to buy before property values go up again.
A little. At least you don't wish her to get hit by a fricken train. I'm just sayin'.
It's quite common to feel that way if you parted on bad terms. Send her a letter. Ask her if she's been zoned as a separate address.
I think you're missing the point here. She's as big as a house? Maybe you should try to get back together with her. Install some big windows in the front. Improve the insulation and get central air conditioning. Add a fireplace. Maybe a nice patio. You could fix her up and have free shelter, or maybe even sell her for a profit. Now's the time to buy before property values go up again.
Thursday, 31 July 2008
Odd News
A New York City man who was forced to leave a casino because patrons complained to staff has filed a complaint about his treatment with the Casino Control Commission. The man was followed into the restroom by a poker room manager and was told of the complaints from other gamblers. The stinky guy returned to his table but was asked to leave.
I don't know about you, but if in a bizarro world I was a 54 year old, 440 pound person who was gambling for 17 hours straight and I was told discreetly that half the casino was vomiting from the odour emanating from my body, the last thing I would do is go back to my seat to face my accusers. And if I had arrived by taxi, I would walk home, no matter how far, to avoid getting on a bus or into a cab near other people. What does this guy do? He makes a scene and then headlines with his antics. And now he demands an apology. You want an apology, Mr. Wax? We're sorry your B.O. will remain ingrained in the minds of our more fragrant clients whose business we may never see again thanks to you.
I don't know about you, but if in a bizarro world I was a 54 year old, 440 pound person who was gambling for 17 hours straight and I was told discreetly that half the casino was vomiting from the odour emanating from my body, the last thing I would do is go back to my seat to face my accusers. And if I had arrived by taxi, I would walk home, no matter how far, to avoid getting on a bus or into a cab near other people. What does this guy do? He makes a scene and then headlines with his antics. And now he demands an apology. You want an apology, Mr. Wax? We're sorry your B.O. will remain ingrained in the minds of our more fragrant clients whose business we may never see again thanks to you.
Wednesday, 18 June 2008
Q & A's from around the web
Why cant i find the guy that dosent care about how big you are?
Just be patient and when the time is right he will show up. You'll be happier in the end
You'll be happier in both ends.
Just be patient and when the time is right he will show up. You'll be happier in the end
You'll be happier in both ends.
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