Magpies are no bird-brains

LONDON (Reuters) – Magpies can recognize themselves in a mirror, highlighting the mental skills of some birds and confounding the notion that self-awareness is the exclusive preserve of humans and a few higher mammals.

It had been thought only chimpanzees, dolphins and elephants shared the human ability to recognize their own bodies in a mirror.

But German scientists reported on Tuesday that magpies -- a species with a brain structure very different from mammals -- could also identify themselves.

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What an utter waste of research money. It's been well-known by many of us who were around in the 60's that magpies are very intelligent, industrious birds.

A very attractive girl

...in the TV commercial for an insurance company says "Call me for a free quote."

What, exactly, is a free quote? Are some insurance companies charging for a quote? Imagine this concept applied to other businesses...

You walk into a candy store, browse around for a minute and then ask:

"How much per pound are these?"

The crotchety, old man says "$8.99".

You say "Thanks" and look around a bit more. You don't see anything that interests you, so you walk toward the door.

"Ahem...that'll be 45 cents, please!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You're in the dentist's chair and you mention you've been thinking about getting veneers. He reaches into a drawer and shows you photos of clients who got the work done and gives you a ball park figure. He adds $35 to your invoice.

Next, I'm going to research how much companies who do not give "a free gift" charge for their gifts.

Canada set to win the World Cup of Soccer 2010

Well, you'd think so if you listened to some of the current crop of players. Let's have some perspective, guys. Canada has only once even qualified for World Cup play. Ever. So, where's all the optimism coming from?

In preliminary qualifying, the "Super Canucks" positively destroyed their opponent, outscoring them 7-1 in two games. Who was this formidable opponent that succumbed to the mighty Canadians? St. Vincent. Yes, you read correctly. But let's not forgot that St. Vincent also includes The Sardines--I mean The Grenadines. For those unfamiliar with the soccer powerhouse, St. Vincent and the Grenadines is an island nation of 118,000 inhabitants situated in the Caribbean.

With high unemployment and people emigrating away, it's impressive that they can even put eleven players together. At last count, there were about 22,000 telephone lines. Dollars to doughnuts says the coach couldn't get in touch with some of the players to inform them of the upcoming games. The second largest country in the world has good reason to strut like the cock of the walk.

Go Canada!

Note: Canada's next game is in two days time against an equally considerable opponent--Jamaica. Team Canada should have an easy go of it as long as the Jamaicans have a good, healthy dose of the local herbal elixir before the game.

Q & A's from around the web

My neck is often sore, probably from sleeping in a funny position. How do I avoid it and secondly, how can I relieve the pain quickest?

Lie on your back and rub it.

How's that going to help my neck?

Frustration Squared

When attempting to to look at my account standing on a particular site, I get the following error messages:

Microsoft VBScript runtime error '800a005b'
Object variable not set
/includes/common.inc, line 1743

When I try to report the above problem through their help facility, I get the following error, but only after I waste my time filling in a ton of information and clicking on "Submit":

CDO.Message.1 error '80040213'
The transport failed to connect to the server.
/support/supportVerify.asp, line 71