Wednesday 31 December 2008

WARNING: Inciting political statements below

The following is a posting I recently made on a message board in response to a fellow poster who asserted that Australia was not only better than the United States, but in his opinion, the best country in the world. It's a little "colourful", but I tend to do that when writing on politics.

Mr. Furple, Australia is indeed a fine country, but you know very well that Canada has been the best country to live for decades. I say so and the United Nations says so. You have either forgotten, dismissed or ignored the posting I made at the NOSY board which clearly shows that Canada has been rated the number one place to live more times than any other country. In fact, Canada is almost always in the top five, currently sitting in the number three spot, one ahead of your lovely country.

In contrast, the U.S. has never cracked better than the number six spot and is currently rated 15th. They just can't seem to get past that "S-word" (Socialism) that their overseers have convinced them spells doom. Ironically (to Americans), the upper echelons of the UN HDI list is always populated by social-minded nations. We seem to have grasped that taking a little more out of workers' pay checks to help those in need makes for a happy and peaceful populace. Americans are stuck in the hell that allows a handful of born-into-money multi-billionaires to stay rich and for millions to be homeless, millions to languish in prisons and much of the rest staging gunfights in the streets fighting tooth and nail for their sliver of the American pie--a pie that is tainted and well past its expiration date.

Another tenet of "the American dream" is freedom and democracy. This dream is really a pipe dream. It is yet another way that the rich fool the huddled masses into buying into this system that forever keeps a small number of people filthy rich and a large number of people...well, just filthy. According to the 2008 Democracy Index (which measures electoral process and pluralism, civil liberties, functioning of government, political participation and political culture), the United States ranks 18th in the world. This kind of performance from a country who purports to export democracy far and wide. What they really export is imperialism for the benefit of the elite few Americans.

Tuesday 30 December 2008

Words of wisdom

A dog was sitting too close to the railroad tracks. A train came by and cut off half its tail. The dog chased the train to try to bite it. The train ran over the dog's head, severing it.

Moral: Don't lose your head over a piece of tail.

Sunday 28 December 2008

2008 will go down as a long year

That's because an extra second will be added at 23:59:59 on December 31st. According to those who keep an eye on the earth's rotation, tides and other factors have skewed the gap between atomic clocks and the sun's position above the earth.

Such factors and adjustments are not rare. Alterations to time are made from every six months to seven years--whenever the earth's position and atomic clocks are off by one second or more.

Learn More

Saturday 27 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

I'd like to chat via yahoo messenger with girls who swallowed a live goldfish. I wanna know more about it?

Listen, bud. Don't think that they're going to want to swallow your minnow.

Tuesday 23 December 2008

How To Install A Home Security System

1. Go to a second-hand store and buy a pair of men's
Work Boots size 14-16 (used)
2. Place them on front porch, along with a copy of
Gun And Ammo Magazine.
3. Put a few giant dog dishes next to the boots and magazine
4. Leave a note on your door that reads


Hay Bubba,

Big Jim, Duke, Slim, and I gone for more ammunition.

Will be back in one hour. Don't mess with the pit bulls-- they attacked the mailman this morning and messed him up real bad. I don't think Killer took part in it, but it was hard to tell from all the blood. Anyway, I locked all of the dog's in the house. Better Just wait outside until we can get back.

Scooter

I've only hunted for two things in my life. Snails--they have a hard time getting away once you track the lil buggers down. And mushrooms--they move even slower than snails. But both are great eatin'.

Saturday 20 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Does anyone know of any politically oriented online games that simulate elections?

Try the Bill and Monica game. Oh. I thought you said "stimulate erections".

Friday 19 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Why do police have locks on their lockers?? I MEAN, POLICEMEN DON'T STEAL!!

THey hve to keep the stuff they steal from citizens out of sight. For example, I had a cop let me go for speeding if I willingly gave him a P-38 German pistol I had on me at the time. I told him a speeding ticket did not warrant me giving him my $1,000 or more P-38 and he told me "What speeding ticket? You were breaking and entering." So, yes, cops do steal.

My husband is a cop and I am sorry to tell you that police do in fact steal. They mostly steal food out of the refrigerator but they have been known to take stuff from lockers as well. From all the b.s. my husband says about his job it sounds like it is pretty much like working anywhere else. People are untrustworthy and annoying no matter where you work. Cops are not above the law, they break it as well.

Thursday 18 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

What is the best dialogue to make someone happy within 1 minuets ?

Even without dialogue, listening to 1 minuet is usually enough to make me happy. :)

Wednesday 17 December 2008

Money!

I've been putting off writing about the stock market, but I can't ignore it any longer. The economic news keeps getting worse and worse and the indexes keep going higher and higher. Something's got to give. I've been out of the market for several months, having exited before the major carnage started, but I've been reluctant to get back in the water, fearing there's sharks just below the surface.

It's possible that the market dropped too low and has corrected itself, but being a pessimist by nature, I am more prone to believe that the recent recovery is a "dead cat bounce". As far as I'm concerned, we have not yet seen the devastating effect all the layoffs are to have on the economy. Everyone is cutting spending. And that includes those lucky enough to have a job right now. They're scared #$!2^@# that they're next on the chopping block...and they probably are.

This sort of situation tends to be a catch-22. The more layoffs there are, the less spending there is. The less spending there is, the worse the economy gets. The worse the economy gets, the more layoffs there are.

I am going out on a not-so-long limb and declare that this thing will get much worse before it gets better. I know I'm not the only one predicting doom and gloom, but I have been posting, chatting, e-mailing and conversing about the emergence of third world countries and the possible economic collapse of the United States for almost 20 years now.

Having said that, I pray it doesn't turn out as bad as I have imagined it, for that would not bode well for the whole world and especially Canada, America's largest trading partner. One bright note is that the emergence of third world nations has provided a much needed diversification of trading partners. If an economic collapse of the U.S. had happened ten years ago, the entire planet might have become "the third world". Today, there's a few others to do business with.

One last thought, and remember, you heard it here first (at least if I am right), I see the American indexes dropping below their previous lows in the coming months. I'll join the market at that point because I expect slow and steady gains going forward for the foreseeable future. However, I'm not giving refunds if I'm wrong.

Monday 15 December 2008

Ripped from the headlines

KABUL, Afghanistan – On a whirlwind trip shrouded in secrecy and marred by dissent, President George W. Bush on Sunday hailed progress in the wars that define his presidency and got a size-10 reminder of his unpopularity when a man hurled two shoes at him during a news conference in Iraq. Each shoe was thrown with great force and accuracy and the president narrowly avoided being struck in the head...twice.

In unrelated news...

Toronto, Canada – Early Sunday evening, the Toronto Blue Jays announced the signing of a pitcher to replace A.J. Burnett who was recently wooed to the Yankees organization with a five-year, $82.5 million contract. No name and few details regarding the Jays' new hurler are known but the release did say "He has international experience".

Friday 12 December 2008

They didn't have robots like this when I was a kid

Here's a story right out of my own backyard. Trung Le of Brampton, Ontario, Canada has been building robots, he says, since he was four years old. He has sunk many thousands of dollars into his hobby and his latest invention is quite an amazing thing--a life-size female android. "Aiko" is a very talented girl with some interesting features such as smooth, life-like skin, breasts and even er, um, naughty bits. Trung is looking for funding that would enable him to "teach" Aiko enough skills to be a viable "employee" for home and or office.


You can read the story for yourself here:

You can watch Aiko in action here:


Thursday 11 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

How can i win a scolorship for master degree ?

First, you'd have to learn how to spell "scholarship".

Q & A's from around the web

Wat do guys look for in grls?

intelegence. i want a gal who can carry on a conversation, who is romantic, and we have to at least ahve a few likeness in some aspects of movies, or music.


Editorial note: I'm not going to start splainin' the irony of the above.

Wednesday 10 December 2008

Great Christmas moments

For those of you who have a partner or children who can't keep their mits off their Christmas gifts before jolly St. Nick arrives, Hallmark has just the thing for you--gift bags that come with a built-in alarm system. A motion sensor will alert everyone in the house that someone is trying to sneak a peek at their Christmas presents. These handy bags come in a variety of sizes and range in price from $4.99-$6.99.

Used creatively, such as placed at the foot of the stairs with a romantic little gift, they also double as an early warning system when you're cheating upstairs with the chick next door. Nothing says love louder than a Hallmark siren wailing like a banshee urging you to quickly stuff the biatch through the window.

New Hallmark Products

Tuesday 9 December 2008

Historic event...pffft.

I let an important(?) event slip by without mention. This past Sunday, a regular season NFL game was held outside of American soil. The Buffalo Bills played host to the visiting Miami Dolphins in a muchly hyped game here in Toronto this past Sunday. I am not and never have been a football fan, but it was difficult not to hear of this "spectacle".

I use quotes because unlike the excitement inherent in most any NFL game, from all accounts, this one was fairly dull. For one, there were few real fans. Not only because neither combatants brought many of their supporters, but because not enough interested Canadian fans could be found to fill the 54,000 seats. Apparently, I'm not the only non-fan--there were seats available at game time. I wonder how much it had to do with the fact that the Rogers family figured $575 a ticket was a fair price for the best seats.

Did I mention that the action on the field was even worse than the attendance? It turned out to be a field goal fest with the Bills on the losing end of a 16-3 final score.

The high point of the day came before the game even started when the girl singing the Canadian national anthem was singing too slowly and the entire stadium sang out loudly and at the right tempo completely drowning out the singer.

Is this heart-wrenching or what?

A dog is run over by what appears to be two vehicles. Another stray attempts to rescue the already dead dog by dragging him away from highway traffic to the safety of the median.





This pooch is also "dog's best friend" and deserves a medal of valour. It's times like these that the memory of my own deceased pet touches my heart. Sometimes, it's an insult to beasts to describe humans as "acting like animals". Our furry friends are often nicer than our fellow man.

Monday 8 December 2008

I see cold people

I was very disappointed yesterday when I attended Woodbine, my local horse racing venue, and they cancelled thoroughbred races 3 through 13. According to the announcement, the jockeys felt it was too cold for them to ride. Having already paid $5 for a racing form and this being the final day of live racing until spring made it particularly upsetting.

Now, I've known them to cancel racing cards due to lightning storms and windy conditions, but this is the first time I've heard the excuse that it's just too cold for the jockeys. While I imagine it's happened before, it seems like a pretty flimsy excuse. After all, standardbred horses (trotters) and their drivers race all winter long through the worst that a Canadian winter can throw at them. Racing in blizzard conditions is almost commonplace. Many is the time when neither fans nor announcer can see the horses at all for much of the race!

I'm sorry if I'm going to upset people, but unless there is a safety concern that was never expressed by the announcer, "too cold for the jockeys" just doesn't cut it with me. The temperature was about 5 C degrees below freezing and there was bright sunshine. Granted, there were wind gusts that produced a wind chill factor, but how bad can it be to be outside for the less than two minutes it takes to run a race? As it was, horses and riders were going directly to the starting gate, dispensing with the post parade.

Most of the betting public spent considerably longer than two minutes walking from the parking lot to the grandstand. I wonder--would the jockeys and everyone else who makes a living from the races be understanding if the public informed them that they would not attend on account of it being too cold to walk from the parking lot? We make that trek even at 40 below! I'm guessing that Mr. Leading-jockey-who's-used-to-spending-the-winter-in-the heat-of-Barbados had a lot to do with the cancellation.

I also wonder why they staged two races before cancelling the rest of the card. It's not like the weather got colder during that time. If anything, it got warmer. Of course, if they had cancelled all the racing before it started, many people wouldn't have attended at all. Once they have us there, obviously we're going to wager on the simulcast races from other tracks. And buy forms and programs. And buy food. Am I the only one who smelled rotten fish?

Speaking of rotten fish, it left a very bad taste in my mouth. I and many others were looking forward to the last day of live racing before the long drought that lasts until April. Jockeys: Next time, bring your long johns.


Horsies frolicking on a beautiful winter day:


You always won every time you placed a bet...

Saturday 6 December 2008

Ripped from the headlines

Man assaults girlfriend with cheeseburger


VERO BEACH, Fla. – A Vero Beach man faces a domestic violence charge after authorities said he assaulted his girlfriend with a cheeseburger. An Indian River County Sheriff's Office arrest report said a 22-year-old man and his girlfriend got into an argument as they sat in a car in front of their home.

The report said the man would not let the woman out of the vehicle, so she threw his drink out of the car. In response, the man allegedly grabbed her arm and smashed the cheeseburger into her face. The pair got out of the car, and authorities say the man again took the McDonald's sandwich and put it on her face.

The man was released on $1,000 bond Wednesday.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I wonder how much the bail would have been if instead he had thrown chicken McNuggets at her.

Friday 5 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Pads vs Tampons which one kicks butt better?

If they're kicking butt, you're a couple of inches too low.

Thursday 4 December 2008

Fewer cars stopped, but a lot more drinking drivers found

Notice anything strange about this article taken from my home town newspaper?

Peel police have charged 18 motorists with drunk driving in the first five days of the Holiday RIDE campaign.
That's triple the number of drivers charged after 2,622 vehicles were stopped compared to the same time period last year when 5,065 vehicles were stopped and only six drivers charged.

Others charged with impaired driving and having an excess blood/alcohol level are: Brampton's Amrik Singh Densa, 41, Khemraj Persaud Rajaram, 36, Sean Anderson, 22, and Jasver Singh, 30, Mississauga's Joao Da-Rocha, 52, Grzegorz Faryna, 48, Oakville's David Vila, 23, and Pickering's Emad Lamie Awad. Charged with having an excess blood/alcohol level are: Brampton's

Edgar Arteaga, 44, Thuan Thi Tran, 25, Mississauga's Samidh Kumar Patel, 28, Sandeep Dhaliwal, 20, Michael Daniels, 19, Darmendrea Nandran, 35, and Oakville's Hannes Carl Svensson, 36. Amarpreet Pahuja, 27, of Mississauga is charged with impaired driving, refusing to give a breath sample and assault.

It just warms my heart to know that many immigrants have adapted so well to the Canadian tradition of getting sloshed during the holiday season and then getting behind the wheel of a car. In fact, it's a disgrace that there's so few "white" names listed above. I challenge every proud Canadian out there named John, Bill, Daryl and his other brother Daryl to get out there, chug some Molson and get some normal sounding names on that police blotter. Show your Canadian spirit!

Wednesday 3 December 2008

I beg your pardon?

Dallas Stars forward Sean Avery is in hot water again. The Superpest of the NHL received a suspension for conduct "detrimental to the league or game of hockey."

The offence occurred when the team was in Calgary and Avery made these comments on camera:

"I'm really happy to be back in Calgary. I love Canada. I just want to comment on how it's become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds."

Avery's ex-girlfriend, actress Elisha Cuthbert, is dating Calgary defenceman Dion Phaneuf and had been romantically linked to Mike Komisarek of the Montreal Canadiens. Avery also dated model and actress Rachel Hunter, the girlfriend of Los Angeles Kings centre Jarrett Stoll.

Elisha Cuthbert:



The Stars were so shocked by their own player's conduct that they publicly supported the suspension. In the past, he's occasionally painted his fingernails black to distract an opponent during a fight. On the ice, he is human sandpaper. Newsweek dubbed Avery "the human equivalent of jock itch."


Tuesday 2 December 2008

Supermarket outlaws

Yesterday, I was at the supermarket check-out line and I noticed that the woman in front of me had eight 24-can cases of coke in her shopping cart. In fact, that's all she had in it. Moments later, a man whom I presume was her husband, brought an empty cart and they transferred four of the cases from her cart to his. Then, they proceeded to nonchalantly and while chattering, pay separately for the soda. In fact, it turns out he was a little short of cash and she provided the needed funds.

The reason was clear, but to verify it, when I got home, I checked the flyer from the store that gets delivered to my door each week (the flyer gets delivered, not the store) and sure enough, the pop was on sale and there was a limit of four cases per family.

Now, not only did they clearly violate the terms of the sale, they also thought nothing of the husband butting in line. Of course, neither offence was serious enough to end in a lynching, though it might have had a deterrent effect not only on those two culprits but also on other would-be supermarket rule violators.

I don't generally call people out on immoral behaviour, but I have on occasion, and I'm feeling sorry today that I didn't that time. Bothersome also, is the fact that the check-out girl never batted an eye during the proceedings. I think she should have lost her badge or at least forced to clean up aisle five for a week or so.

I wonder if people would be as quick to break with store rules if there were a gallows with two dummies hanging from it in the centre of every supermarket with a sign that reads "THEY VIOLATED THE LIMIT OF FOUR PER FAMILY PURCHASE RULE". Or perhaps a man on a cross--I don't mean as a threat to be crucified, but as a reminder to be decent for Christ's sake. Well, either way.

Monday 1 December 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Where can i get a PhD online for free?
One of those dodgy ones where you put your name down and get a PhD for nothing..I want to be a doctor.

People are well aware of this buddy, and do a HUGE back-round check.

A back-round check??? You can spot a phony doctor by checking their ass? Most doctors put their degree on a wall.

Saturday 29 November 2008

Indiana woman dies at 115 as world's oldest person

SHELBYVILLE, Ind. - Edna Parker, who became the world's oldest person more than a year ago, has died at age 115.

UCLA gerontologist Dr. Stephen Coles said Parker's great-nephew notified him that Parker died Wednesday at a nursing home in Shelbyville. She was 115 years, 220 days old, said Robert Young, a senior consultant for gerontology for Guinness World Records.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The above sounds like something I could have made up, considering that the story came from Shelbyville, a fictional town next to The Simpsons' home town of Springfield, and the gerontologist bearing the same name as the actor (Robert Young) who played the lead in the TV series "Marcus Welby, M.D.", who himself lived to a ripe old age of 91, but I assure you the story is authentic.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Parker outlived her two sons, Clifford and Earl Jr. She also had five grandchildren, 13 great-grandchildren and 13 great-great-grandchildren.

Parker taught in a two-room school in Shelby County for several years after graduating from Franklin College in 1911. She wed her childhood sweetheart and neighbor in 1913.

Coincidentally, Parker lived in the same nursing home as 7-foot-7 Sandy Allen, whom Guinness recognized as the world's tallest woman until her death in August.

News Story

Friday 28 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

How long should I let them go at it for? I put my male hamster with the female over an hour ago and they are still having sex. How much longer should I let them go for?

It depends. How much money did he put on her dresser?

Thursday 27 November 2008

Brilliant CSI's? I think not.

What's up with every location in every episode of CSI taking place in the dark? The CSI geniuses are smart enough to find a kidnapped person from a single clue of a wasp larva burnt to a crisp found in the wheel well of an abandoned car, but they're not smart enough to turn on the lights in their lab to examine evidence? The biggest item in the crime unit's budget must be for flashlight batteries. Gimme a break.



Wednesday 26 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

What can I use to discipline my wife that won't leave any scars or bruises?

Your tongue.

Tuesday 25 November 2008

Ripped from the headlines

The Canadian Press

N.S. lobstermen told to stay clear of area near sunken, diesel-laden barge

HALIFAX, N.S. — On the first day of the fall season for Atlantic Canada's biggest and most lucrative lobster fishery, federal officials warned Nova Scotia lobstermen to stay away from an area where a dredging barge carrying 70,000 litres of diesel sank in rough seas on the weekend.

An emergency response team confirmed Monday that surveillance flights spotted a long, narrow slick of some kind of oily substance about 15 metres wide and about 1,600 metres long.

Reporters aboard several news helicopters as well as small crafts that have made their way to the scene confirmed that the government's warning to lobstermen is being heeded as none of the creatures have been spotted near the wreck thus far.


File photo of lobsterman.


News item

Monday 24 November 2008

ADT turns the lights off

Recently, I noticed an ADT TV commercial that has been playing very frequently. For anyone who doesn't know, ADT is one of the biggest and most respected security companies in North America. The reason I noticed this commercial is because in it, the announcer says "You can arm and disarm your home remotely and even turn on and off your lights". Now, you can call me a nit picker and I wouldn't object...so long as you don't do it by saying "Go home and pick them your nits".

Was this commercial translated from Japanese to English? Did none of the hundreds of people who read, saw, heard, were involved with or approved this commercial notice the glaring disjointed phrase? Perhaps the CEO's nine-year-old daughter wrote the copy.

I just decided to see how common this "flowery" phrase is. I got 121 hits on google for the exact phrase "turn on and off your lights". Well, it's nice to know that if ADT ever needs another ad writer, there's plenty of them out there who are up to its standards.

Ok, I'm leaving my keyboard now and going to turn it on my TV.

Sunday 23 November 2008

Listen to yo mama

As a card-carrying purebred Italian, I have always made my own pasta sauce from scratch. Last week, I either suffered a stroke or someone put a spell on me or something and I did a very uncharacteristic thing: I bought a jar of prepared sauce. My mom might disown me if she finds out. The relatives might stone me or shun me--ok, I'm alright with being shunned.

Let me explain. I had decided to try to reduce my grocery bill, so I started buying things that are on sale. Most of the items are things that I buy anyway--it's just that I have always bought them regardless of whether they were on sale or not. For the most part, it's been working out extremely well. Then I saw that I could pick up a jar of Ragu pasta sauce for $1, a fraction of what it costs me to make sauce from scratch--and without the work!

Long story short...it was little better than pouring ketchup on my spaghetti--yeccchhhh. Ragu puts the rag in Ragu. Even covering my bowl with a generous helping of Parmesan cheese wasn't enough to redeem the dish. Unfortunately, I am also Catholic and live by the rule that wasting food is a sin, so I had to suffer through three separate times eating the vile sauce. Mama mia!...was right again.

Friday 21 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

How is todays schooling different from 50 years ago ?

nothing different

Jews are considered humans now... anyone that notices them thieving is considered a racist.

They used to like, teach ya stuff, man.

they didn't go around killling each other and raping and having sex in school.

Thursday 20 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

What is the difference between a pre-op and post-op transexual?

About six inches.

Tuesday 18 November 2008

Mmm, mmm, good

If you ever wondered why kids' writing skills have been deteriorating for, well, quite frankly, decades, this blog entry may shed a little light on the situation. What follows is a letter copied verbatim that my daughter brought home from school about ten years ago. I just happened across it today and decided to post it. The teacher who wrote it committed an error in virtually each and every sentence in it, sometimes making three or four errors in a single sentence. In fact, she wastes no time in her assault on the English language by screwing up the salutation!

Parent and Guardians

The school council had become aware of another fund raiser that is no cost to you but could be a great benefit to the school.

Unlike the Kellogg’s fund raiser where it was for a short time span, this is one that continues over every year. Campbell’s food has a program that can benefit the school in many aspects. They ask us to collect soup labels (the entire label in GOOD condition). This includes all soup labels form Campbell’s, Chunky Soups, Classic Soups, Hearty Request, Half Fat, Special Selections, and Pepperidge Farms Goldfish Crackers snacks. This also includes their larger size can of 48 oz cans of soup.

The labels must be sent in by May 15, 1999, but we can continue to collect them to put them into out 1999/2000 year totals. We will be notified in early spring 1999 with details on how to register for the years 1999/2000 program. This program has been running 25 years in the U.S. and is now launched across Canada in the fall of 1998. The program runs from September to May every year with the labels’ count carried over to the next year.

With the help of friends, relatives and the school in whole we would be able to make a big dent in collecting the labels Here is some of the merchandise categories:
Computers, Sport & Equipment, Musical Instruments, Electronics, Videocassettes, CD-Roms, etc.

Please forward your entire label in good condition to the school so we can get started on a great fund raiser with nothing our of your pocket except the food you would put on your table.

If any questions please do not hesitate to call or talk to one of the school council representatives. Thank You for your support in helping your school get better for the sake of all the students in St. Stephen.

Saturday 15 November 2008

I reported an issue to MickeySoft

...about their recent implementation of a new release of Windows Live Mail (hotmail). Here is my report followed by their response followed by my response to their response:

From : Vinny xxxxxx@hotmail.com
Sent : Sunday, November 09, 2008 1:28:25 AM UTC
To : LV_ML.WNLV.WW.00.EN.MSF.SEA.TS.T01.RTG.00.EM
Subject : Windows Live Mail:Other:Viewing Messages

Service :
Windows Live Mail

What type of problem do you have?
Other [Other]

Viewing Messages [Viewing Messages]

Be specific when describing your problem. The details that you include enable us to promptly send you the most likely solution to your issue.

"Check Mail" is no longer a function. Is there another way?



From: WEBCS.WLHM.00.00.EN.SYK.MNL.TS.T01.SPT.00.EM@css.one.microsoft.com
To: Vinny xxxxxx@hotmail.com
CC:
Subject: RE: SRX1084189647ID - Windows Live Mail:Other:Viewing Messages
Date: Wed, 12 Nov 2008 04:00:19 -0800

Hello Vinny,


Thank you for writing to Windows Live Hotmail Technical Support. My name is Anna and I apologize for the delay in responding to your e-mail. I gather that you no longer have the Check Mail function. I understand the importance of this matter to you.

Windows Live Hotmail has just released a new version to provide better user experience. Check Mail function was removed. We understand this change may have come as a surprise to you, but we strongly feel you will soon have a much better experience with the new Windows Live Hotmail. As always, your satisfaction is our main goal.

To learn more about the new features and benefits of Windows Live Hotmail, please visit:

http://www.windowslive-hotmail.com/comingsoon/en-us/default.htm

We recognize that a change like this can feel unexpected and surprising, and we are eager to hear your feedback (both positive and negative) about the auto-upgrade process.

To send your feedback:

1. Please go to http://feedback.live.com/eform.aspx?productkey=wlmail&page=wlfeedback_home_form
2. Select the first option in the drop-down list, "I want to provide feedback on the automatic update to Windows Live Hotmail."

or click on the help icon "?" and choose "Feedback" on the upper right side of the page.

You are valuable at Windows Live and we look forward to provide you with consistent and effective service. We appreciate your input and involvement in our Windows Live products.

Sincerely,


Anna P.
Windows Live Hotmail Technical Support


Hello Anna,

Thank you for writing to me. My name is Vinny and I apologize for the delay in responding to your e-mail. I gather that you are aware that I no longer have the "Check Mail" function. I don't believe you understand the importance of this matter to me.

I understand that Windows Live Hotmail has just released a new version to provide better user experience. "Check Mail" function was removed. You understand this change came as a surprise to me, and while I strongly feel I will soon have a much better experience with the new Windows Live Hotmail, I also strongly feel I will miss the "Check Mail" function. If, as always, my satisfaction is your main goal, you would either explain how I can accomplish the same function, as my e-mail asked or else take steps to re-introduce the function.

I have learned more about the new features and benefits of Windows Live Hotmail, at:

http://www.windowslive-hotmail.com/comingsoon/en-us/default.htm
but it doesn't address the removal of the "Check Mail" function.

The change was unexpected and surprising, and I am eager to hear your feedback (both positive and negative) about the auto-upgrade process that removes a popular function without warning.

You are not so valuable at Windows Live since you did not answer my question on how to accomplish the function in the new version of Windows Live Mail but I look forward to you providing me with inconsistent but hopefully, occasional effective service. If you appreciate my input and involvement in Windows Live products, please respond with useful information.

Sincerely,

Vinny M.
Windows Live Hotmail user

Friday 14 November 2008

The psychosis of corporations

For anyone who still had a modicum of respect for the institution of corporations, guess what Goldman Sachs and Morgan Stanley are doing with the $10 billion of American taxpayer bail-out money. What else? They are giving out $12 billion in year-end bonuses, mostly to executives, of course, who have done a fine job taking them to the brink of bankruptcy. Oy.

Their reasons for the bonuses are further testament to the depth of their mental malady. According to them, the purpose of the bonuses is to retain "the talent". The same "talent" that nearly put the company under. The powers that be are so clueless that they don't know that if "the talent" leaves over being disgruntled over a lack of a bonus this year, that 1) they are spared the expense of a possible severance package should they need to cull the herd and 2) that this is an employer's market where they can re-hire better talent and for less compensation. Duh.

Thursday 13 November 2008

Always think of your health

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Someone I know who is retired recently related this story:

The other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about five minutes, and when I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said to him, "Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break?" He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a "Nazi". He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a "doughnut-eating Gestapo". He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn't care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said "Obama in '08 ". I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important to my health.

Wednesday 12 November 2008

Whose side is God on?

I stopped on a religious channel where an American soldier was recounting his experiences in Iraq. Several times he explained how he kept asking God to show that He was on his side. It seemed bizarre and incongruent that a believer should call on God while he is directing his tank to bombard the hell out of people across the river.

It made me think of the old expression "Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition". Certainly anyone uttering this phrase sees the irony in it. Was the soldier's tale any different? How different was his situation from the enemy combatants possibly shouting "Allah is great!"?

I can understand a person defending his life with deadly force if he were in immediate danger. I cannot comprehend someone going half way around the world with the express purpose of killing people and then invoking God's name for his protection or even His help in killing other human beings.

Tuesday 11 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

In what ways do you worship George W Bush?

As a human reflection of Dionysus, the god of drunkeness and tomfoolery

i cry out his name while having problematic bowel movements

Monday 10 November 2008

Ripped from the headlines

Portland Tribune - Fort McMurray, Alberta

A man has been charged with marijuana possession and cruelty to animals in an unusual case in this sleepy Canadian town. Fred Ketchup will be arraigned in court on Monday after police received a call about the suspicious death of a beaver.

A man walking along a ravine came upon the remains of the animal. The scene appeared suspicious and police were summoned. While authorities were investigating, incredibly, Mr. Ketchup, whose property backs onto the ravine, appeared at his back fence nonchalantly smoking a joint.

Police smelled the pot and went to speak with Fred. After a few minutes he was taken into custody and driven to the station where he allegedly confessed that he had stashed a bag of marijuana at the foot of a tree by the ravine.

Police released this photo as a warning to area beavers of the dangers of marijuana.


Sunday 9 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Atheists, do you find it condescending when christians say to you "I will pray for you"?

Absolutely. Those kind of people are no better than box-cutting wielding maniacs who crash airplanes into office buildings.

I usually respond with "I will think for you."

Saturday 8 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Is it legal to send/transmit one-way signals to space?

Just out of curiosity, are you wearing a tinfoil hat right now?

Friday 7 November 2008

Ripped from the headlines

BBC News - Extracts from cannabis could help reduce brain damage in stroke victims, according to new research.

American scientists say they have found that several of the chemicals in cannabis or marijuana help to prevent damage to brain tissue.

The report is likely to lead to increased pressure to make marijuana and its derivatives more widely available for use on prescription.

Seen below is the leader of the research team:


Thursday 6 November 2008

How ironic is it?

How ironic is it that a video game about death, destruction and war is rated "M"? I don't know about you, but what I would call someone purchasing such a game is definitely not "Mature". Maybe the "M" rating stands for "Moron"?

Wednesday 5 November 2008

How ironic is it?

How ironic is it that the election of Obama as president of the United States has made virtually the whole world jubilant while almost half the citizens of the united States are so completely distraught over it? Barack Obama was widely called a terrorist and even the anti-Christ. How could 150 million people hold such an extremely different view from the other six billion people on the planet?

I think the answer lies in the fact that Americans think quite differently than the rest of the world. And Obama is more like the rest of us than he is like the average American. In the minds of a great number of Americans, this can only spell disaster. Several had expressed to me that they would leave the country if Obama were to be elected. Remember, these are the same people who elected George W. Bush to office not once but twice. I think this makes it extremely clear how Americans think.

Right now

It's warmer in Toronto (17 C.) than it is in:

San Francisco (16 C.)
Rome (16 C.)
Paris (10 C.)
London (10 C.)

Must be all that globally warmed Arctic air wafting down.

Inappropriate image

Just what was this young lady thinking? The kid on the far right has no qualms about staring directly at heaven. I have a feeling these boys will never forget that day.


Tuesday 4 November 2008

Britney Spears caught nude by hidden camera

An amateur photographer has made public explicit photos of...

Sorry, guys...this is just an experiment to see if scandalous keywords increase hits.

Monday 3 November 2008

Friday 31 October 2008

My granddaughter's first Halloween

My government working for and with me

Today, I received a flyer describing options for developing public transit along a major route linking my community, which is part of the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) with another part adjacent to mine. The combined population is well over one million residents. It is a well-designed, three-page, glossy, full-colour pamphlet detailing options, pros and cons of options and outlines a plan of major milestones. One section is a chart indicating where and when community workshops are being held to allow input from and discussion between the public and project planners. I was very impressed with the entire content of this communication from my elected officials, especially the fact that they decided to include me in the process of shaping my community. There's only one little glitch in the whole thing: THE MEETING FOR MY AREA HAPPENED TWO DAYS AGO! In fact, two of the five scheduled meetings for different areas have already taken place! And unless I was the last one to receive my invitation, the third meeting will have taken place before some people are notified.

If the same kind of planning and execution goes into the rest of the project, it should be an overwhelming success. NOT!

I just sent a modified version of the above to my rep for Brampton. I, of course, am not holding my breath waiting for a response.

Q & A's from around the web

Why do visible police cars have to be replaced by ambulances?

Because they can't find the invisible ones to replace.

Thursday 30 October 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Are the ice caps going to melt?

That depends. How long ago did you pick them up at the coffee shop?

Wednesday 29 October 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Any suggestions on Great toddler snacks?

Toddlers are great on crackers with melted cheddar.

Monday 27 October 2008

Grammar policing

It's becoming more and more difficult to find someone who can compose even a simple sentence, anymore. This promotion is hosted by a popular Toronto radio station on their website:

Sky Restaurant and Cocktail Lounge is in Mississauga at 2680 Skymark Avenue. From award-winning jumbo wings to signature salads. Comfortable, elegant dining.

The second and third "sentences" are invalid. There's no action/verb. I would change them thusly:

We serve award-winning jumbo wings to signature salads. Enjoy comfortable, elegant dining.

I suppose it's not as egregious as an error appearing in the New York Times or other prestigious publications. I've seen errors in many of them. Sometimes two or three in the same paragraph. And I'm just a lay person who didn't even finish high school. I finally decided to get my GED when I was in my forties.

Is this the last frontier...

...of the women's movement? While so much has changed for women over the last 50 years or so, one thing that seems to be resisting tooth and nail is the notion that men are expected to pay for the cost of a date. I should mention that I am old school and have always picked up the entire cost of a date. It does, however, seem like an outdated thing to do, especially if the female is well-off financially. I'm sure the practise has its roots in the fact that very, very few women used to work, and therefore had no money. Don't you think it's time that we drop traditions that no longer make sense for the times? I was astounded at some of the answers people gave to the following question (I didn't ask it). (I am copying the question and answers verbatim and adding my comments in red.)

Question:

Why are guys supposed to pay for dates?

It just seems a little unfair, doesnt it?
I'm all for being a gentleman and stuff, but its just been on m mind...

Every girl's all about empowering women nowadays, so it just seems a little out of place...

Answers:

I guess it's just the traditional way and shows that the guy cares.

If paying shows caring, does it follow that when a woman doesn't pay, it shows she doesn't care?

because paying for the dates would be something a gentleman would do

Using the same logic, a woman who doesn't pay is not a lady?

Because he's the guy

The girl above thinks that picking up the tab is in the male genes.

Do you want to talk about unfair? Try having to pass a human through a little tiny hole later on in life. . Or have monthly visits taht make you all moody and irritable. You have got it made. next time you feel like complaining about it remember what we have to go through . Dont complain & just pay the bill =) plus if you do.. its so much more attractive. even though we are all about "empowering" we still like manners and having respect.

Wow. The girl above thinks it's only fair that males should pay for dates as compensation for the inconveniences that the female physiology possesses. Furthermore, every guy a girl dates should pay for the day she has to suffer the pain of passing some other guy's child. And since, according to her, it's also a matter of manners and respect, I think we can conclude that she rarely displays her manners or shows respect.

Because it'a woman who will have to pay for rasing a child alone, if anything goes wrong.

Interesting take. This young lady's idea of "a date gone wrong" is getting pregnant, having a child, and the father skipping town. And she demands a free meal just in case such unfortunate circumstances arise. I suppose that's fair compensation.

Oh, c'mon. Admit it; you just don't want to spend the money. It's okay to be a cheapskate if that's what you want. Don't blame it on the ladies.

What this woman believes is that a person who doesn't pay for a date is only a cheapskate if they don't have a vagina.

i like it its better that way its like their role they barely do anything nowadays anymore the least they could do is pick up the check

The lady above doesn't mind dating lazy, ne'er-do-well's, so long as they pick up the check. And it also sounds like she feels all men are lazy.

Sunday 26 October 2008

Q & A's from around the web

If you're in your car stopped in traffic, and look over and find a girl staring at you, and then when you look at her, she smiles, does that mean she wants you?

Yeah, she does. And $80.

Saturday 25 October 2008

Global warming

I was standing at the supermarket checkout yesterday and they had a a small ad taped to the scale where it is just below the height of most people's chin. It was hard not to notice it. It was a plea for charity. Specifically, it said "Could you still ignore it if it were this obvious?" Below that, was a picture of a sad looking boy of perhaps eight years old sporting a t-shirt which read "I'm Hungry". Apparently, I could not and I reached into my pocket and gave the requested Toonie (Canadian $2 coin) to the cashier.

Before I had advanced to the point of the sign, I had noticed that the girl in the queue ahead of me was buying quite a few tins of cat food, and it sparked the affection I will always hold for felines since I had 13 beautiful years with my own cat before I had to put him down due to health problems. Anyway, as I started to put my items into my eco sac, I noticed a cat food tin, so I quickly looked up and out the door and could see the girl who bought them, and gathering up my stuff, I rushed out and caught up with her as she was getting into her car. I handed over the tin and as she thanked me, I told her we can't have hungry cats meowing all over the countryside.

As I continued on my way home (walking distance from the store), I noticed that despite the nip in the October air, the two events left me feeling a little warmer than I was on my way to the store. I would like to take this opportunity to challenge you all to go out of your way in the next day or two and perform a random act of kindness, no matter how small. This kind of global warming is good for the planet.

Friday 24 October 2008

From the anals of time

At my age, pinpointing when something occurred, is sometimes tricky. My best guess is that the following occurred around the early 90's.

On a hot summers day, in Guelph, Ontario, Canada, young Gwen Jacobs was walking along the sidewalk of a busy downtown street. She suddenly decided right there and then that it was unfair for men to walk along topless while women had to be uncomfortably covered. She removed her top and nonchalantly continued her trek. In due course, as one might expect, the police arrived on the scene, "scene" being the operative word here, and promptly arrested her.

Gwen, the assertive and resourceful gal that she was, even at her tender 20ish age, secured herself a good lawyer. To make a short story shorter, the court was convinced that she was right in having equal rights to a man in regards to public (un)dress.

The effect of the case was immediate, if not widespread. In the following months, the occasional young, and even not so young, female could be seen exercising her new-found "freedom of expression", most often at beaches, parks or in one case, while watering the front lawn. Each incident that was spotted by a member of the hordes of press that were now scouring all venues they thought might yield another "Gwen", was immediately flashed across the television screens and had everyone wagging their tongues about it. Beach attendance figures broke all records that summer, attended by mostly adolescent boys (of all ages) hoping to get a head start on September's anatomy class.

Well, extremely conservative Canadians couldn't stand for such a public debacle. But what to do about it? When a "lady" of a certain age, in a small public pool, with even smaller children, insisted on exposing her ample bosom, thereby covering up her navel, enough was enough. The police arrested her and somehow managed to convict her of some sort of community standard statute. After that, one or two more incidents were reported to have occurred at the beach and that was the end of it. Canada was proud to revert back to the prude it has always been. And Gwen Jacobs was indelibly etched in Canadian history.

Thursday 23 October 2008

How much more dirty can politics get?

The following ad has been playing on TV more times than I can count the last few weeks.



It seems to me that if politicians put half as much effort into serving the people as they put into digging up dirt and defaming their opposition, things would be a lot better for all of us. I've never understood why they get away with the slanderous messages they bombard us with. They never seem to get sued. I'm sure that at least some of these messages are true but either way, they are scumbags for libelling someone so viciously or else they are scumbags for having done what they're accused of. I can't wait until one of them is "exposed" as a paedophile or necrophiliac.

Tuesday 21 October 2008

Caution: offensive content

Earlier this evening, I found another reason for my waning interest in watching hockey. Mind you, it's not a biggee, but just the same...

The Toronto Maple Leafs' Nik Antropov had just tied the game late in the third period against the Mighty Ducks (I still can't believe they adopted that name). The home crowd was going wild and the camera did a pan across the Leaf bench.

Many of the players were looking down as if there was something fascinating going on down there, and many others were looking in various directions, looking about as interested as if they were at a lawn bowling game. No offence to lawn bowlers who many I'm sure can make the Maple Leaf team.

Getting back to the camera pan, it stayed long enough on one player for the presumably millions of faithful Canadian hockey fans to witness the "horking up" of a "loogie" just shy of the size of a regulation golf ball, and its propulsion halfway across the ice surface, quite possibly landing on centre ice. If it were black, it might have instigated an invalid faceoff. However, the best was yet to come. One player, who will remain nameless, only because I was less interested in him, than he was that the camera was on him, had an index finger lodged up his nose, seemingly to the third knuckle, where it remained until it was out of camera range.

I think the ending of Taxi Driver is less offensive...maybe because it is reminiscent of old-time hockey. ;)

Background music

The song you're hearing is from one of my recent music videos. I'm thinking of playing some background music here on an ongoing basis. If you like this song, it's The Beatles' Free as a Bird (currently third one down) found here: www.videosbyvinny.blogspot.com

Q & A's from around the web

Where does salami come from?

Same place steak and chops come from--an animal. A salami is a four-legged mammal about 5 feet tall that is found only in western Europe. It is the only mammal known to man that is completely hairless. --Vinny

Yes the native salami is endangered now, so cunning italians decided to gather up all the necks and arseholes left over after they had slaughtered a pig, and assorted other bits and pieces and brew it up into a mess that could quite possibly kill you if made the wrong way, forced it into a bit of guts twisted the ends and hung it out to dry, and called it salami. --Mick

Italians aren't that cunning...looks like they missed an arsehole. --Vinny

Monday 20 October 2008

In praise of older...jockeys

Yesterday, a field of eight oldsters lined up for the fourth race at the Santa Anita thoroughbred racing track. However, in a twist, it was the jockeys that were older nags this time. Eight retired racing legends faced off in a bona fide race that saw Canadian Sandy Hawley mark his 6,450th victory.

Hawley, 59, won the Jockey Living Legends race on a horse named Tribal Chief, and was followed to the finish line by seven other retired Hall of Famers. They were, in order, Jerry Bailey, 45; Gary Stevens, 45; Pat Day, 55; Julie Krone, 45; Jacinto Vasquez, 64; Chris McCarron, 53, and Angel Cordero Jr., 65.

Hawley went gate to wire but Bailey had a chance to run him down in the stretch and had this to say after the race: "I got there, and then I had to try and remember what you do in that situation."

Meanwhile, Hawley was humble as he quipped "The horse dragged me to the wire. I got to the stretch, he was still running fine, so I had to tap him a couple of times with the whip to look like I was doing something."

Cordero was equal to the task, remarking "It's OK. I'm used to losing to these guys."

The crowd of 12,000 had a great time.

Sunday 19 October 2008

I thought he was kidding

Someone posted about tent cities in the United States. I have not seen anything in the news about it, so I thought the guy was joking. Just to be sure, I did a search and found this:






The chickens have come home to roost.

Q & A's from around the web

Is it wrong to walk around your own home naked?

Only if it's an old age home. (shudder)

Thursday 16 October 2008

Rogers update #5

Another week and another non-e-mail from Rogers. I think I've been patient enough. I just sent the following to Rogers in regard to their last e-mail that said the issue was handed off to another department and I was assured someone would contact me:

Tell them not to bother. I have my answer. Not only does Rogers have no scruples, stooping to tricking people into viewing their ads, its customer service stinks. I'll be passing along the message to as many people as I can all over the web, on message boards, through e-mail, blogs, etc. As soon as I find a suitable replacement, I'll also be terminating my Rogers account.

Have a good day, sir.


Wednesday 15 October 2008

At the polling station

Yesterday, I went to exercise my right to cast a wasted vote in our (Canadian) federal election. As I handed over my driver's licence as identification, I quipped to the lady there "Are there any photo Id.'s that don't look horrible?" She laughed, examined my photo for a couple of seconds and then said "This one isn't bad at all." She handed it back to me along with the voting slip.

I went to the private "booth" to mark my "X", but the whole time, something wasn't sitting right with me. And then it struck me. She woman felt that the hideous creature staring out from my driver's licence is a good representation of me. Now, I'd be the first one to admit that I've never been movie star material, but it never occurred to me that I might make the short list to play Quasimodo.

I'd post the offensive image, but I don't want to risk anyone rendering their keyboard inoperable.

Tuesday 14 October 2008

Q & A's from around the web

Best way to remove back hair?

Marry a gorilla. It won't get rid of your hair but when you walk along the beach holding her hand, no one will notice your hairy back.

Monday 13 October 2008

It's Canadian Thanksgiving

In looking at the screenshot I took at the weather network, it made me think that perhaps Montana belongs to Canada.



Oh, wait. It may be more appropriate for it to belong to whomever owns Alaska. It's much too cold to belong to us.


That's right--I have nothing better to do on Thanksgiving than to compare temperatures around the continent. What a turkey, I am. Actually, the turkey is in the oven. I just finished baking a butter pecan cake (they made me a deal I couldn't refuse at .99 for the mix and it was the best flavour remaining), and I'm waiting for it to cool so I can slather it with vanilla frosting.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my fellow Canadians! And to all my American friend, I hope you don't get snowed in, today.

Sunday 12 October 2008

Way to grow hair on bald skin found

It's hair-raising news for millions of men - scientists have revealed they have found a way to grow hair on bald skin.

The breakthrough came after researchers discovered a gene in stem cells which can re-grow hair follicles on mice. The new stem cells also have all the same identities as an original hair follicle. The remarkable work overturns previous scientific views about the identity of follicle stem cells. The researchers discovered that mice hair follicles contain a chemical compound called Lgr5 which was previously thought to only live in the intestine and colon. By transplanting the protein Lgr5 on to the backs of dead eight-week-old mice, the scientists found they could re-grow hair.

Furthermore, the 'new' hair follicle would stay healthy and continue to grow for as long as 14 months.

Story

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

But, it was not all good news, today. In Washington, bureaucrats are scrambling to try and figure out a solution to what is viewed as an inevitable problem arising from the experiments and expected to become evident in the coming weeks and months: What to do about the (heretofore) majestic symbol of the United States, the bald eagle.



Thursday 9 October 2008

Classic cars from my childhood

I was in my early teens when my older brother came home with one of these beauties one day:




Somehow, it seemed even more beautiful back then to a wide-eyed boy who religiously read his brother's hand-me-down Car & Driver magazines. To me, the car represented awesome power, even if its looks didn't convey it. Only the hood work over the engine gave a hint of what was underneath. That and the diminutive emblem on the front fenders indicating 396 CID.

For the uninitiated, it was a 1967 Chevrolet Chevelle SS 396 (SS signifying "Super Sport", not Nazi). The 396 cubic inch displacement engine packed as much as 375 horsepower. This was the age of muscle cars and this was certainly one of them.

Here's a gallery of pix of that model immaculately restored/maintained: Click here.

As for my brother's car, I will never forget the first time my brother took me for a ride in this machine. We zipped along down Keele Street weaving in and out of traffic, laying rubber in any gear. He entered the circular ramp to the eastbound 401, and as we neared the end of the ramp, I was unprepared for the fury that was about to be unleashed.

Bro switched gears, stomped on the accelerator, and I was driven (literally) back against my seat with a G-force I had never experienced before in my young life, or for that matter, ever since. The front of the car seemed to lift up making me feel like we were headed skyward. There I sat glued for what seemed like an eternity, and feeling like I couldn't breathe as we screamed down the highway, the engine roaring like an angry lion.

That car was a harbinger of things to come. In 1970, the mother of all muscle cars rolled out of Detroit: The Chevelle SS 454. This monster delivered an unbelievable 450 horsepower--more than any other stock car in that era.

While looking for pix, I came across some sale prices for the '67 Chevelle SS396, the highest being an incredible $87,000.

Next, I will review another car my brother actually rebuilt around the same time he had the Chevelle: a '57 Chevy

To see all posts in this series click here.

Last Kiss music video.

Click here to go to most recent posts.

Wednesday 8 October 2008

Rogers update #4

Still no word from Rogers regarding their devious ad (explained in this article). Time to rattle their chain once again...

I sent the following e-mail a little while ago:

If you have nothing concrete to report yet, please indicate so. On the other hand, if you think that ignoring a valued 30-year customer is in the best interests of your employer, I will be happy to convey that sentiment for you to your manager.

The gentleman responded in less than 10 minutes apologizing that the issue was handed off to another department, but that he will have them contact me.

Twiddling my thumbs...

Ethnic adventure

I was picking up groceries the other day and was thinking I'd like something other than the usual side dishes. At that very moment, I spotted a box of couscous. I had heard about it many times but had never had occasion to try it. It's a popular dish eaten in many parts of the world and I like just about everything, especially ethnic food, so I decided to give it a try.

I had already planned to have a stirfry as my main dish and I thought the Couscous would complement it, nicely. I should mention here that at the time, I had no idea what couscous was. I prepared both parts of my meal and was very happy that the couscous was so easy to make--just add butter and boiling water and when it's done, fluff with a fork. In no time, my meal was ready.

The couscous looked very appetizing with a light, airy texture. I took a mouthful of stirfry, chewed it for a bit and then threw a spoonful of the couscous into my mouth. It...wasn't that great. I repeated the process. Strangely, it hadn't improved since the first mouthful. Still, being the good, Christian boy I am, and having been taught as a youngster that it was a sin to throw away food, I soldiered on.

In between bites, I got some salt and added a bit to the couscous. Surely that will be the difference between what I was tasting and what will be an exquisite, gastronic delight. It improved slightly, but not much. I refused to be beaten, thinking surely this dish must be better than what my taste buds are telling me. In desperation, I tried adding a little sugar. Now, before you think me crazy, let me inform you that I have a real sweet tooth and that...er...stuff did look sort of like cereal. It...didn't help at all. Grudgingly, I finished my meal.

The experience left me wondering why anyone would pay to eat the stuff, especially those in desert areas, where the dish is a staple, when they could eat sand for free. Although I know that throwing the rest of the box away is a sin, the risk is worth it.

Tuesday 7 October 2008

Watch out for grab and run artists

A seagull in Marinette , Wisconson has developed the habit of stealing Doritos from a neighbourhood convenience store. The seagull waits until the Manager isn't looking, and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos. Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds.

The seagull's shoplifting started weeks earlier when he first swooped into the store in and helped himself to a bag of Doritos. Since then, he's become a regular. He always takes the same type of chips.

The Manager thinks it's great because people are coming to watch the feathered thief make the daily grab and run, and it's been good for business, especially since
customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of Doritos because they think it's so funny. However, the Manager did say, "This is Wisconsin, and if that seagull starts to grab a 6-pack of beer to go along with the Doritos, I may have to put a stop to it."


Monday 6 October 2008

Q & A's from around the web

When/how did you know that your marriage/relationship was over?

When I woke up after falling asleep watching TV, to find two big, burly guys carrying me, still in my chair, to the curb on garbage day. I'm kidding. It wasn't garbage day.

Sunday 5 October 2008

The results are in

I entered the CAA (Canadian Auto Club) contest for the greenest driver with this entry:

Hi. I’m Vinny’s car. Yeah, that’s me in the photo--the one who’s red with anger. Back in the good, old days, Vinny and I were pretty racy, going between traffic lights like jack rabbits. Boy, that was fun. Now, he's so boring, driving all sensible-like. Says it saves gas and wear and tear on the brakes. Where’s the fun in that?

He used to take me out a lot more, too. Now, he works from home and we live across the street from a mall and I have to practically beg him to go anywhere. Even going out for drinks (of oil) has gone from every 3 months or so, to only twice a year, even though it’s less than 4,000 kilometres in between.

Vinny’s been very cold toward me lately, considering he hardly ever turns on my air conditioner. Last week, I replaced my droopy tires with nice, firm, new ones and he didn’t even notice! Sure, he’s getting on in years, but my odometer is barely over 100,000 Kms. One of these days, Vinny will come outside and he might just see a “For Sale” sign on this gal.



It seems it wasn't good enough for even an honourable mention. The first place prize of an all-expense paid eco-trip for two to Costa Rica was awarded to (surprise, surprise) a couple who have been CAA members for 28 years. Okaaaaaay. I'm just kidding--I'm not the least bit upset. I wish the lucky winners a great trip and all the best.

Saturday 4 October 2008

Caught in a web

I spotted what appeared to be a dead housefly on the floor beside my
dresser. As I bent down to have a look, I saw that it was caught in a
web with lines so thin, they were virtually invisible. Nearby, a very
tiny spider sat patiently. The fly struggled to free itself, but it was
in vain. After a few moments, the spider moved in. The fly was about
100 times the size of the spider. Nonetheless, he grappled with the
fly for a while and suddenly the fly was still.

Surprisingly, that minuscule arachnid managed to drag the fly away
behind the dresser. I stood up and tried to think what I should do. My
first inclination would be to move the dresser, and sweep up the web,
fly and spider, not necessarily in that order, and dump the mess in
the garbage can. That was about a week ago. In the meantime, I looked
in on my house guests several times by moving the dresser slightly,
and though it is too dark to see spider or web, the fly remains.

I feel powerless to make a difference even to a dead fly, a
microscopic spider and the web and dust that is collecting back there.
I don't want to kill the spider or remove his source of food, even
though I cannot tell if he is even still there. The crazy thing is
that this inconvenience to me, a clean freak, weighs on me. For another
reason. It seems this spider has more influence in the universe than
I do. After all, he took down a monster 100 times his size and I can't
seem to take down a speck which is him that is one billionth the size
of me.

A thought suddenly strikes me: How much "humanitarian" currency am I earning for this?
How much did I earn when I made a sizable donation to the Southeast
Asia Tsunami relief fund when it was I who was in need of funds? How
much did I earn when I gave to The hospital For Sick Children in
Toronto when it was I who was in need of care? How much did I earn
when I walked 30 miles for The United Way charity while I now walk alone? Like my
existence in this world, the answers don't make a lick of difference.
The truth is, whatever good I have done, and admittedly, it wasn't
enough, I would do it and more, again, regardless of the outcomes. I
just reserve the right to bitch about it. For you see, it is I who is caught in a web.

Friday 3 October 2008

Memories of Sam

We had always thought our cat Sam to be stupid. I'm not sure how he rated compared to other felines since we never had another cat and have never known any others intimately. He just seemed pretty dumb. However, he did have flashes of brilliance. Many years ago, we found that if we hung a rubber band over a (toggle type) light switch, he would jump up and pull it down, and in the process, the light turned off. It was impressive to our guests when we demonstrated this trick as I shouted "Turn off the light, Sam", especially if they didn't notice the rubber band I had placed there ahead of time.

Another thing he did, was close the cupboard door by pushing it with his head after I had poured his food and then put the food bag back in the cupboard. He would only do this if I poured the food into his dish on the counter. If I tried the operation on the floor, a tank couldn't keep him from getting at the food in the dish. He just started doing it all by himself. Occasionally, he didn't do it but if I moved the cupboard door, he'd get the idea and push it closed with his head.

Not long before I had to put him down for health reasons (his not mine), I taught him something else. He used to try and get at his food dish so fast as I was placing it on the floor that sometimes he caused me to spill water onto the floor. To avoid this, I would push down on his back, forcing him to lay down about 18 inches from his "dining area" and I shouted "Stay!". He would usually stay there until I placed the dish down and gave him the order and motioned to "Go!". It sounds sick and cruel, but sometimes, just for fun, I made him stay there for 20 seconds or longer, repeating "Stay!" whenever he started to make a move for the dish. :)

In the end, I got much too used to him. He was such a long-time and close friend that it was like he was human. Once, while on the computer (me, not him), there came a noise from another room. He was laying behind me on the bed where he usually was when I was at the keyboard. I turned to look at him and without thinking, I said "Go and see what that noise is".

More evidence of my lunacy: I put water on the burner and came back to my PC while it was heating up. I suddenly realized that I had left it too long and as I made a dash for the kitchen, I noticed him laying in the hall. As I stepped over him, I angrily said "Why didn't you remind me I had water on the burner?".


RIP, Sam.

Thursday 2 October 2008

On extreme capitalism

I just came across something I posted to a message board a couple of years ago and I like it so much I'm posting it here:

America was founded by people tired of being "oppressed" by others. A nation founded on the principle of freedom. However, with freedom comes competition. And with competition comes great winners and great losers. Those who find ways to win at all costs often destroy weaker competitors, even if only by circumstance. And the strong who acquire power and status are able to circumvent the few rules/laws meant to protect the weak by hiring fast-talking, Harvard-educated, charismatic executives and lawyers. The weak, in desperation, turn to crime or end up on the streets or both. In a dog eat dog world, this polarization is inevitable.

The ultimate example of freedom is nature. And we can learn a lot from observing it. Animals are free to do whatever they please, so long as they are bigger, stronger, have sharper teeth--whatever gives them an advantage over other animals. And what do we see in nature? We see packs of vicious animals preying on the weak, old, young and infirm. And then, even in the winning group, the stronger ones eat first and the most. Pecking order dictates that those most in need, often end up dying.

I contend that while freedom to succeed is a good strategy to promote discovery and invention and therefore a better life for all overall, it does not hold that more freedom means even more success. I believe there is a point that when crossed, it puts people closer to the realm of animal behaviour than we should want. That point is when profit is put ahead of human life.

When pollution is allowed on a scale that causes human illness or death, when water or food supplies are insufficiently tested that threatens human health, when competition is so fierce that the stress causes great numbers to either take meds for life, give up or be unable to find adequate employment, when crime is seen as a viable alternative to the rat race, when landlords have the right to maintain unlivable conditions, when corporations produce defective products that can harm or kill people and do so because lawsuits may be cheaper to settle than the cost of a recall, that point has been crossed. We are behaving like animals.

Q & A's from around the web

can you get pregnant while having sex in a hot tub?

It depends. Were your eggs hard-boiled at the time? Were his?

Wednesday 1 October 2008

Classic cars from my childhood

I was inspired by a preview of a new movie called "Sex Drive" to produce articles on some of the cars I grew up with and loved--no...still love, as they live on not only in my memories, but also preserved in stills and video. Indeed, many of them still run and are the stuff car shows are made of.

Enough with the nostalgia. The car that caught my eye in a commercial for the movie was a Pontiac GTO Judge. It's name was derived from a bit in Rowan and Martin's Laugh-in TV Show where Sammy Davis Jr. was a freaked out judge and the catch phrase was "Here come da judge...here come da judge...". Goldie Hawn got her start on that show as a bikini-wearing, body-painted, lovable, dumb blonde. Oops. I can't seem to keep from dredging up the past. But it's so damn interesting.

The GTO Judge made its debut in 1969, when I was 15 (this would explain why I remember Goldie so vividly). It came stock with a 350-horse power, 400 CID (cubic inch displacement) engine or with an optional 455. I think it is a near perfect combination of pretty looks and an undertone of powerful-looking. What do you think?





The year the GTO Judge was introduced (1969), it was surpassed in sales by the Chevrolet Chevelle SS396, a car my older brother owned and which I'll be featuring in my next article on this topic.

To see all posts in this series click here.

Last Kiss music video.

Another car music video.

More music videos.

Click here to go to most recent posts.

Tuesday 30 September 2008

Rogers update #3

No word yet from Rogers regarding their devious ad (explained in this article). I can't wait to see what they're going to say.