Showing posts with label president. Show all posts
Showing posts with label president. Show all posts

Sunday 25 January 2009

Q & A's from around the web

Why DID BUSH PROMISE TO CATCH OSAMA BIN LADEN DEAD OR ALIVE THEN FAIL??

Unless Bin Laden is right next to the oil, they will never find him.

Monday 15 December 2008

Ripped from the headlines

KABUL, Afghanistan – On a whirlwind trip shrouded in secrecy and marred by dissent, President George W. Bush on Sunday hailed progress in the wars that define his presidency and got a size-10 reminder of his unpopularity when a man hurled two shoes at him during a news conference in Iraq. Each shoe was thrown with great force and accuracy and the president narrowly avoided being struck in the head...twice.

In unrelated news...

Toronto, Canada – Early Sunday evening, the Toronto Blue Jays announced the signing of a pitcher to replace A.J. Burnett who was recently wooed to the Yankees organization with a five-year, $82.5 million contract. No name and few details regarding the Jays' new hurler are known but the release did say "He has international experience".

Thursday 13 November 2008

Always think of your health

Working people frequently ask retired people what they do to make their days interesting. Someone I know who is retired recently related this story:

The other day I went downtown and into a shop. I was only there for about five minutes, and when I came out, there was a cop writing out a parking ticket. I said to him, "Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break?" He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. I called him a "Nazi". He glared at me and wrote another ticket for having worn tires. So I called him a "doughnut-eating Gestapo". He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn't care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said "Obama in '08 ". I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired. It's important to my health.

Tuesday 11 November 2008

Q & A's from around the web

In what ways do you worship George W Bush?

As a human reflection of Dionysus, the god of drunkeness and tomfoolery

i cry out his name while having problematic bowel movements

Wednesday 23 July 2008

This just in...

Perhaps you've heard: President Bush thinks that "Wall Street got drunk."

After asking guests at a private fund-raiser to turn their cameras off (clearly, at least one person didn't), Bush continued: "It got drunk, and now it's got a hangover. The question is: How long will it sober up and not try to do all these fancy financial instruments?"

With brilliant economic acumen like that controlling the American purse strings, it's a miracle the country hasn't completely imploded. I hope for everyone's sake it doesn't sink much further before the next inauguration takes place and a more advanced form of primate takes office.