Sister Mary Ann

Sister Mary Ann, who worked for a home health agency, was out making her rounds visiting homebound patients when she ran out of gas. As luck would have it, a Texaco gasoline station was just a block away.

She walked to the station to borrow a gas can and buy some gas. The attendant told her that the only gas can he owned had been loaned out, but she could wait until it was returned. Since Sister Mary Ann was on the way to see a patient, she decided not to wait and walked back to her car.

She looked for something in her car that she could fill with gas and spotted the bedpan she was taking to the patient. Always resourceful, Sister Mary Ann carried the bedpan to the station, filled it with gasoline, and carried the full bedpan back to her car.

As she was pouring the gas into her tank, two Baptists watched from across the street. One of them turned to the other and said,

'If it starts, I'm turning Catholic.'

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Wave at the nice policeman

Thank God most criminals are dumb. We might be in serious trouble, otherwise. Case in point:

A young man walking along a highway near Kenora, Ontario, Canada spotted a police car going by and took the opportunity to "flip the bird", give a "middle finger salute" or whatever you want to call the rude gesture. The cop turned his vehicle around and stopped to chat with the guy.

During the exchange, it came to light that the man was carrying a number of stolen items, including two credit cards, a GPS, an IPod charger and a BlackBerry. The 19-year-old was charged with possession of stolen property.

The police officer said "A simple wave would have been a wiser choice".

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Heh...I was right on

Raptors lose by 13 in another of a long string of uninspired efforts. This, to a team whose record is only better than two teams in the entire NBA. A women's team can beat Raps on most nights. No offence to women.

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By how many points...

...will the Raptors lose to the lowly 21-47 Golden State who have lost their last six? 5 points? 10 points? 15? More?

Raptors, who have lost 7 of their last 8, have given a much-needed lift to several teams lately who were in a slump. Multi-million dollar contracts and they get out of the way every time the opposition heads to the basket. Three nights ago, Sacramento scored almost half their points with layups and 43 points in the third quarter alone. I think it's disgusting. Frankly, I don't know why anyone would want to pay to watch them. It's sick. And sickening.

Do the honourable thing and find another line of work. Here's a novel idea: earn your money. White and blue-collar workers alike are mostly not thrilled with their co-workers, bosses and working conditions, yet they bust their humps for their few shekels. With a multi-million dollar salary, why can't you put whatever BS is bothering your sensibilities aside and do your job?! If not for your employer, do it for your own pride and/or for your fans.

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I love Calderon, but I couldn't resist

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