How messy does a room have to be to warrant a 9-1-1 call?

An Ohio man who argued with his grown son over a messy bedroom said he overreacted when he called 911. Andrew Mizsak called authorities Thursday after his 28-year-old son threw a plate of food across the kitchen table and made a fist at him when told to clean his room.

The son, also named Andrew, lives in a room in his parents' basement.

The father declined to press charges and told police he doesn't want to ruin his son's political career.

The son, who also works as a political consultant, said he's lucky to be living in the house rent free. He also promises to keep his room clean.

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Editor's note: The story isn't funny enough on its own. Look at the comments it elicited...

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"The son, who also works as a political consultant, said he's lucky to be living in the house rent free."

Got to be a Democrat.

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"threw a plate of food across the kitchen table and made a fist at him when told to clean his room."

Hmmm... gets angry when confronted with the mess he's made - MUST be a Republican.

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"He also promises to keep his room clean."

Must be Green Party.

Another difference of the sexes

I don't know why manufacturers of women's personal products have always felt so comfortable pushing their products in our faces. Men don't seem to need to have personal products advertised in order for them to select one and use it.

From the time that young girl first complained to her mother about not "feeling fresh", and her mother advising her to use Summer's Eve douche, such ads have had me shaking my head in disdain. Is it really necessary to show the applicator in a Tampax ad? The applicator of a yeast infection product? Puhlease.

The recent TV commercial for Monistat is about as tacky as they come, in my opinion. A woman dressed in her night clothes is seen standing in her bathroom with the apparent sound of a thunderstorm. As the camera pans toward the mirror she is standing front of, we see a look of concern on her face and that around her crotch are dark clouds and lightning bolts as the announcer says something like "Don't let a yeast infection get you down".

Cue the product package while extolling its amazing properties.

Suddenly, the woman is transported to her bright kitchen, smiling and enjoying a cup of coffee. The raging storm in her groin has been replaced by sunshine, birds singing and a rainbow. Oh, brother.

Strange creatures

I'm at this moment watching the Toronto Blue Jays beating up on the Chicago White Sox. "Doc" Halladay has just struck out his eighth batter trying to improve his record to 9 and 1 and for the team to extend their American League East lead. Last week, Doc beat the Yankees and his (Doc's) most excellent student of last year, A.J. Burnett. A.J. left the Jays at the end of last season after a terrific (I believe) 18-win season for a contract of about $80 million with New York.

But I'm not here to talk about Doc or the Jays or Burnett for that matter. A few minutes ago, I noticed something a bit strange and amusing. I've seen it many tmes but never really thought about it. If you've watched any baseball, you've probably seen it, too. A pitch was tossed into the dirt and immediately after the catcher caught it, he extended his glove back so that the umpire can take the ball. The umpire raised the ball toward his eyes and examined it. The thing is, every time they do that, they always discard the ball. I mean always. And yet, they consistently go through the ritual of having a look at it before doing so. Why bother? Why not cut out the middle man and have the catcher toss the ball aside? I guess it gives the umpire an air of superiority and power that only he can make the decision as to the fate of the ball. In reality, the decision is made the moment the ball hits the ground.

I'm thinking the gesture the umpire makes is sort of like the other useless habit many people have--the disgusting habit of examining the itsy bitsy piece of foreign material they pick out of any one of various orifices like the corner of their eye, their ear, or worst of all, their nose. Funny creatures, humans.

Canada defends north with Cannon

A bruhaha has been brewing at the North Pole. Canada's sovereignty has been repeatedly tested by a number of nations intent on using her northern waterways and even on making land grabs. The far north is believed to contain oil and mineral deposits and Russia has been posturing by planting a flag at the North Pole seabed and conducting aerial exercises in the region.

In reaction, Canada has been bolstering her military and coast guard presence. Canadian Foreign Affairs Minister Lawrence Cannon said Thursday that the Conservative government will strive to "work peacefully" with other polar nations but "will not hesitate to defend Canadian Arctic sovereignty." In February, two Russian bombers made an Arctic test flight, which Canadian military aircraft scrambled to intercept.

Stay tuned, kiddies. This cat and mouse game is not over. There is a lot at stake and it's anybody's guess where this goes.

Lois gets the better of Superman

Toronto-born original Superman artist, Joe Shuster, was supposedly meek and mild mannered like Clark Kent. But he, too, it seems, had a secret identity. Some accounts say that Joe and his co-creator, Jerry Siegel, sold the rights to their ultimate super hero to DC Comics for a mere $130.

To make ends meet, Joe Shuster took to drawing scenes of S&M porn in the same style as characters Clark Kent, Lois Lane, etc. The 16-volume series was titled "Nights of Horror. Now, author Craig Yoe has published an illustrated hardcover covering the story, called Secret Identity: The Fetish Art of Superman's Co-creator Joe Shuster (Manda, $27.50). The story surrounding the artist's descent into sadomasochistic pornography is bizarre even as a comic-book tale.

Here's a sample of Joe Shuster's dalliance. Maybe this is the kind of scene Joe had always envisioned Superman and Lois Lane in.