I can easily imagine a few of the lines in the following video taken from a late night Fox News show being used in a Canadian comedy production. Making light of our army is as much a part of our identity as the fact that the Canada's military has participated in more U.N. peace missions than any other country, including the United States. But given that there's a war going on in Afghanistan, a war where Canadians have had more soldiers there than any other country except for the U.S., I find it to be in very bad taste. This coupled with the fact that this aired while we were honouring the latest four fallen soldiers, bringing the total number of Canadians lost in this war to 116, elevates the statements to deplorable.
Imagine that a Canadian news program went on the day after 9/11 and participants joked and laughed about how Americans can't build office buildings properly, etc. How appropriate would that be? In comedy, it's all about timing. And this segment's timing was way off. How funny does it seem now?
Tuesday, 24 March 2009
Monday, 23 March 2009
The old boy is still (marginally) lucid
I am very happy to report that over the last few weeks, I made two moves putting sizable chunks of my money back into the market. I am now about 50% invested. I have almost given up trying to pick winning stocks or even winning mutual funds, so over the last year or so, my entire portfolio has been in a mix of money market (pays virtually nothing, but it's a safe haven) and a fund based on the TSX (Toronto Stock Exchange) index.
Where will the markets go from here? It's anybody's guess. Everyone (including me) has been predicting longterm doom and gloom, and I still believe it. But the markets have surprised several times recently and also in the past, doing things unexpected. While we have not yet felt the full effects of millions of laid off workers, and that tide probably has not eased yet, the markets could very well look beyond it and ride the optimism that has currently washed over investors who believe that Obama and co. are on the right track to resolving this unprecedented financial collapse.
If only I were allowed to shift my money as often and in real time as I felt market conditions warranted, I might be able to make serious money, but alas, my financial institution only applies changes requested before 3 p.m. at day's close and once you shift money into a fund, whether it's a true mutual fund or it's a money market or index fund, you cannot move money out of it for a whole month (you can, but severe penalties are applied making it unproductive--they consider it day-trading). Still, I've managed to generate (almost) enough money to live on for the last six years. It's a meagre existence compared to the high life I lived for the last few decades, but for reasons I'm not ready to divulge, this will have to do.
Note:
On December 17th, 2008, after U.S. markets made large gains following the big drop, I wrote this...
I see the American indexes dropping below their previous lows in the coming months. I'll join the market at that point because I expect slow and steady gains going forward for the foreseeable future.
And on February 27th, I reiterated my sentiment here...
I'm not convinced that we have hit bottom, yet.
Sure enough, early in March new lows were forged. Technically, I was wrong about slow and steady gains following it--they have been nothing short of tremendous to this point. As I write this at mid-afternoon, North American exchange indexes are up around four percent on the day.
Good luck to you all in your investment decisions! And to anyone who is suffering financially, chin up--better times will return.
Where will the markets go from here? It's anybody's guess. Everyone (including me) has been predicting longterm doom and gloom, and I still believe it. But the markets have surprised several times recently and also in the past, doing things unexpected. While we have not yet felt the full effects of millions of laid off workers, and that tide probably has not eased yet, the markets could very well look beyond it and ride the optimism that has currently washed over investors who believe that Obama and co. are on the right track to resolving this unprecedented financial collapse.
If only I were allowed to shift my money as often and in real time as I felt market conditions warranted, I might be able to make serious money, but alas, my financial institution only applies changes requested before 3 p.m. at day's close and once you shift money into a fund, whether it's a true mutual fund or it's a money market or index fund, you cannot move money out of it for a whole month (you can, but severe penalties are applied making it unproductive--they consider it day-trading). Still, I've managed to generate (almost) enough money to live on for the last six years. It's a meagre existence compared to the high life I lived for the last few decades, but for reasons I'm not ready to divulge, this will have to do.
Note:
On December 17th, 2008, after U.S. markets made large gains following the big drop, I wrote this...
I see the American indexes dropping below their previous lows in the coming months. I'll join the market at that point because I expect slow and steady gains going forward for the foreseeable future.
And on February 27th, I reiterated my sentiment here...
I'm not convinced that we have hit bottom, yet.
Sure enough, early in March new lows were forged. Technically, I was wrong about slow and steady gains following it--they have been nothing short of tremendous to this point. As I write this at mid-afternoon, North American exchange indexes are up around four percent on the day.
Good luck to you all in your investment decisions! And to anyone who is suffering financially, chin up--better times will return.
Sunday, 22 March 2009
Life in the fast lane
I glanced over at the magazine rack at the supermarket, yesterday, and on the cover of the latest issue of Cosmo, is the following:
Sex that brings you closer:
These moves will light a bonfire in his pants...and in his heart.
And:
What guys want after sex.
My reaction to the first storyline is that I'm getting a sense of why young people seem more confused than at any time in history about the difference between love and sex. I am by no stretch of the imagination a prude--never have been, but in my humble opinion, sex, no matter how great, can never have the lasting and cementing effect that love can on two souls. In fact, I would go so far as to say that spectacular sex early in a relationship seems to have the opposite effect. I'm not sure why--I've never thought to analyze it, but my personal and friends' experiences seem to bear this out.
You've probably heard someone say "All we have in common is great sex." It's doubtful you've ever heard anyone complain "All we have in common is a tremendous love for one another."
This is not to say that you can't have both, but great sex more often follows falling in love than the other way around. Just to clarify, if someone is after no-strings great sex, that's their business. What I'm saying is that I believe magazines like Cosmo are leading naive people into believing that the quickest way to a man's heart is through his pants. I think following such advice will only lead to eventual heartache and pain...even if there are a few mind-blowing orgasms along the way.
As far as the second storyline goes, I thought it was pretty clear to just about everyone over 16 what guys want after sex: to get away from the girl as quickly and as far as possible. Of course, I didn't open the magazine to read the article, but if it contradicts this in any way, it's B.S. There is one caveat to this rule, however. Girls, if you offer to make him a sandwich, he might stay a while. Especially if you tell him he can eat it off your ass.
They had one thing in common, they were good in bed
She'd say, 'Faster, faster--the lights are turnin' red."
Life in the fast lane. Surely make you lose your mind.
Sex that brings you closer:
These moves will light a bonfire in his pants...and in his heart.
And:
What guys want after sex.
My reaction to the first storyline is that I'm getting a sense of why young people seem more confused than at any time in history about the difference between love and sex. I am by no stretch of the imagination a prude--never have been, but in my humble opinion, sex, no matter how great, can never have the lasting and cementing effect that love can on two souls. In fact, I would go so far as to say that spectacular sex early in a relationship seems to have the opposite effect. I'm not sure why--I've never thought to analyze it, but my personal and friends' experiences seem to bear this out.
You've probably heard someone say "All we have in common is great sex." It's doubtful you've ever heard anyone complain "All we have in common is a tremendous love for one another."
This is not to say that you can't have both, but great sex more often follows falling in love than the other way around. Just to clarify, if someone is after no-strings great sex, that's their business. What I'm saying is that I believe magazines like Cosmo are leading naive people into believing that the quickest way to a man's heart is through his pants. I think following such advice will only lead to eventual heartache and pain...even if there are a few mind-blowing orgasms along the way.
As far as the second storyline goes, I thought it was pretty clear to just about everyone over 16 what guys want after sex: to get away from the girl as quickly and as far as possible. Of course, I didn't open the magazine to read the article, but if it contradicts this in any way, it's B.S. There is one caveat to this rule, however. Girls, if you offer to make him a sandwich, he might stay a while. Especially if you tell him he can eat it off your ass.
They had one thing in common, they were good in bed
She'd say, 'Faster, faster--the lights are turnin' red."
Life in the fast lane. Surely make you lose your mind.
Saturday, 21 March 2009
No good deed goes unpunished
Yesterday, as promised, I went to the store to pay for the item they mistakenly did not charge me for the day before. I picked up a few items, including another jug of canola oil. As I approached the checkouts, I scanned the cashiers and was happy to see that the very attractive one was working the express lane.
After I paid for everything, I said to her in a hushed voice "You're going to think I'm crazy, but yesterday I bought one of these (grabbing the oil) and they didn't scan it at all, so take this one back." She said "I do think you're crazy...you could have given it to me." At that point, I noticed the lady bagging her stuff ahead of me had slowed her actions and dropped her mouth open in apparent agreement with the cashier's assessment of my mental condition.
Smiling, I said (to the cashier) "The next time someone forgets to charge me for jewellery, I'll give it to you."
In retrospect, I think the girl in her early 20's would prefer to get oil from this 54 year old. Also, in retrospect, I never should have evoked conversation with the girl. Better to maintain the fantasy of a perfect female specimen than to shatter it by finding she's prone to dishonesty. And finally, in retrospect, the beautiful girl I used to have a "pleasant" customer/employee relationship with, now thinks I'm an old weirdo. At least I can sleep well at night. Alone, but well. I don't think that Karma sh*t works.
After I paid for everything, I said to her in a hushed voice "You're going to think I'm crazy, but yesterday I bought one of these (grabbing the oil) and they didn't scan it at all, so take this one back." She said "I do think you're crazy...you could have given it to me." At that point, I noticed the lady bagging her stuff ahead of me had slowed her actions and dropped her mouth open in apparent agreement with the cashier's assessment of my mental condition.
Smiling, I said (to the cashier) "The next time someone forgets to charge me for jewellery, I'll give it to you."
In retrospect, I think the girl in her early 20's would prefer to get oil from this 54 year old. Also, in retrospect, I never should have evoked conversation with the girl. Better to maintain the fantasy of a perfect female specimen than to shatter it by finding she's prone to dishonesty. And finally, in retrospect, the beautiful girl I used to have a "pleasant" customer/employee relationship with, now thinks I'm an old weirdo. At least I can sleep well at night. Alone, but well. I don't think that Karma sh*t works.
Friday, 20 March 2009
What would you do?
Yesterday, I was at the checkout of a supermarket and as usual, I did a quick guesstimate of the cost of my items so that I can get the appropriate amount of money out of my pocket. I had $15 in my hand but was surprised when I was asked for only seven dollars and change. I didn't think much of it since I have often been surprised by how inexpensive things are at this particular store.
When I got home, it occurred to me that $7.xx couldn't possibly have been correct. I looked at my receipt and sure enough, the 2-litre jug of canola oil had not been scanned at all. I hadn't paid much attention to the price on the shelf, but it must be in the $5 range. It took me about ten seconds to decide to go back (today) and pay for it.
Let me assure you that I am not well-off. In fact...I'd rather not go there. Suffice to say, an extra $5 in my pocket would be very welcome, even if it wouldn't have much company in there. It would certainly mean more to me than to that supermarket. Regardless, I will pay for the item.
That's the kind of guy I am; the kind of guy I've always been. And even though I've gotten screwed many times in my life, sometimes by people, and even institutions for that matter, I don't know how else to be. Truth be told, I did some rather unsavoury things in my youth and perhaps a few small indiscretions as an adult, although none come immediately to mind, but they have always weighed heavily on me. Just the thought of being dishonest bothers me.
I have been called crazy more than a few times by people who had encouraged me to take advantage when such opportunities presented themselves and I declined. In a few instances, taking the high road has cost me very dearly. Reflecting on those times, I am resentful for having been taken advantage of. But I harbour resentment at the people and institutions that perpetrated it, not at myself for leaving myself open to it. Sadly, I'm afraid I might do it the same way, again. Gladly, it's virtually impossible for such circumstances to reoccur.
Rather than leave this post on a dour note...
When I got home, it occurred to me that $7.xx couldn't possibly have been correct. I looked at my receipt and sure enough, the 2-litre jug of canola oil had not been scanned at all. I hadn't paid much attention to the price on the shelf, but it must be in the $5 range. It took me about ten seconds to decide to go back (today) and pay for it.
Let me assure you that I am not well-off. In fact...I'd rather not go there. Suffice to say, an extra $5 in my pocket would be very welcome, even if it wouldn't have much company in there. It would certainly mean more to me than to that supermarket. Regardless, I will pay for the item.
That's the kind of guy I am; the kind of guy I've always been. And even though I've gotten screwed many times in my life, sometimes by people, and even institutions for that matter, I don't know how else to be. Truth be told, I did some rather unsavoury things in my youth and perhaps a few small indiscretions as an adult, although none come immediately to mind, but they have always weighed heavily on me. Just the thought of being dishonest bothers me.
I have been called crazy more than a few times by people who had encouraged me to take advantage when such opportunities presented themselves and I declined. In a few instances, taking the high road has cost me very dearly. Reflecting on those times, I am resentful for having been taken advantage of. But I harbour resentment at the people and institutions that perpetrated it, not at myself for leaving myself open to it. Sadly, I'm afraid I might do it the same way, again. Gladly, it's virtually impossible for such circumstances to reoccur.
Rather than leave this post on a dour note...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)