Window washing dominates news

Two window washers were stranded for almost two hours, 19 storeys above ground-level after the electrical wires of their lift became entangled with a sign and was pulled out of a socket, leaving them without electricity and unable to get back down.

The thing I found most interesting about this news story was the name of the reporter.

Don't forget to check the oil

If you wondered how bad the economic downturn is for the airline industry, here's a clue. This Air Canada pilot at Toronto's Pearson International Airport was spotted doing a chore normally performed by other staff.

Dead man walking!

Yesterday, I took the longest walk since my recent heart attack. I went about two miles (round trip) to re-fill one of my prescriptions. It was quite pleasant even if most of the way my nostrils were filled with car exhaust and for a short stretch the fumes of some solvent from a homeowner who was painting or something. The worst part of the trip was paying the almost $100 for a one-month supply of Lipitor. If the heart attack doesn't kill and you survive the hospital food, the cost of medication should do the trick. I hope I die soon--I can't afford the meds that are keeping me alive! Did I mention the side effects of taking five different drugs each day? I'm not sure if I mentioned it because one of the effects is being in a stupor. I think I used to be a fairly smart guy. Now, when there's a knock on my door, I open the refrigerator door. It wouldn't be so bad, but now I'm 20 pounds overweight and I need to go on diet pills I can't afford.

How messy does a room have to be to warrant a 9-1-1 call?

An Ohio man who argued with his grown son over a messy bedroom said he overreacted when he called 911. Andrew Mizsak called authorities Thursday after his 28-year-old son threw a plate of food across the kitchen table and made a fist at him when told to clean his room.

The son, also named Andrew, lives in a room in his parents' basement.

The father declined to press charges and told police he doesn't want to ruin his son's political career.

The son, who also works as a political consultant, said he's lucky to be living in the house rent free. He also promises to keep his room clean.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Editor's note: The story isn't funny enough on its own. Look at the comments it elicited...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The son, who also works as a political consultant, said he's lucky to be living in the house rent free."

Got to be a Democrat.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"threw a plate of food across the kitchen table and made a fist at him when told to clean his room."

Hmmm... gets angry when confronted with the mess he's made - MUST be a Republican.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"He also promises to keep his room clean."

Must be Green Party.

Another difference of the sexes

I don't know why manufacturers of women's personal products have always felt so comfortable pushing their products in our faces. Men don't seem to need to have personal products advertised in order for them to select one and use it.

From the time that young girl first complained to her mother about not "feeling fresh", and her mother advising her to use Summer's Eve douche, such ads have had me shaking my head in disdain. Is it really necessary to show the applicator in a Tampax ad? The applicator of a yeast infection product? Puhlease.

The recent TV commercial for Monistat is about as tacky as they come, in my opinion. A woman dressed in her night clothes is seen standing in her bathroom with the apparent sound of a thunderstorm. As the camera pans toward the mirror she is standing front of, we see a look of concern on her face and that around her crotch are dark clouds and lightning bolts as the announcer says something like "Don't let a yeast infection get you down".

Cue the product package while extolling its amazing properties.

Suddenly, the woman is transported to her bright kitchen, smiling and enjoying a cup of coffee. The raging storm in her groin has been replaced by sunshine, birds singing and a rainbow. Oh, brother.