First bubble man, now bubble woman

This ad appeared adjacent to an article by Ann Coulter.

Are they kidding? Why would anyone waste money on whatever they're selling. The ad itself probably works better to boost testosterone. Well, maybe it's not as effective when it's in close proximity to Coulter--the anti-testosterone.


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Women follow me wherever I go

The following ad has been popping up regularly lately, seemingly following me around.

(Click to enlarge.)

Can someone please explain to me why these busty, attractive women:

a) want me instead of a young man?

b) have so much trouble meeting men that they feel they need to use a dating service? They certainly don't look shy!

c) if they're looking for a sugar daddy, isn't there an app for that?

I think the ad would be more believable if instead of saying "you", it said "Vinny".

Just the same, I'm afraid I have to decline. Sorry, ladies--this old man is taken.


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Dangerous stunt

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Why is this man smiling?

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Chris Bosh is a wild man

No offence to Chris Bosh, who is one of my favourite basketball players and an all round stand-up guy, but from the moment I saw him with his relatively recent new hair style, it reminded me of someone. You tell me if there's a resemblance:

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Dead man walking!

Yesterday, I took the longest walk since my recent heart attack. I went about two miles (round trip) to re-fill one of my prescriptions. It was quite pleasant even if most of the way my nostrils were filled with car exhaust and for a short stretch the fumes of some solvent from a homeowner who was painting or something. The worst part of the trip was paying the almost $100 for a one-month supply of Lipitor. If the heart attack doesn't kill and you survive the hospital food, the cost of medication should do the trick. I hope I die soon--I can't afford the meds that are keeping me alive! Did I mention the side effects of taking five different drugs each day? I'm not sure if I mentioned it because one of the effects is being in a stupor. I think I used to be a fairly smart guy. Now, when there's a knock on my door, I open the refrigerator door. It wouldn't be so bad, but now I'm 20 pounds overweight and I need to go on diet pills I can't afford.

From the "Wow" file..

I saw this on the news on TV...












Apparently, the man only suffered minor injuries. How bizarre is that?

Ripped from the headlines

I saw a headline for this story on the TV listings channel and then hopped over to my PC to find the full story.

A homeless man who couldn't find a warm place to spend the night was rudely awakened by police in the bank lobby he was was catching Z's in. As punishment for his crime, he was sentenced to 30 days in a larger, warmer room, this one with free meal service. I'll bet he won't want to go through that ordeal again.

The Story.

Lyin' Eyes

I knew the girl featured in my Lyin' Eyes music video reminded me of someone and now I know who. A blast from the past that went into oblivion. A girl who had touched a soft spot in my heart. And most ironically, she, like the girl in the video, married a man very much her senior. Pia Zadora married in the lyrics of the Eagles tune "a rich old man" of 55 when she was just the tender age of 23. You be the judge. Do they look alike?